Looking Before you Leap into Entrepreneurship Part 3
Sex is sales. (Red is for your skimmers)
Not going to lie, when I got into entrepreneurship I thought I would make a killing quickly. It has taken me a while to connect the parallels between dating and business. Largely because I had a complete misunderstanding of the relationship between branding, marketing, and sales.
Much like teaching a kid on the block selling rocks, then having to take a math test saying: 6X + 7Y. I was in total confusion. But when you explain it as: 6-Bloods and 7-Crips not being able to combine. All of a sudden, the whole game opens up and the dots instantly become connected.
Desirability, Attraction, Seduction= Branding, Marketing, Selling
For the last 7-8 months, I have been studying how to effectively communicate my solution to parents, coaches, and swimmers. Despite my expanding articulation, driving demand for my service has been the hardest part. Going through this process was a series of taking L-s and pivoting: Copywriting, persuasion, sales books – I absorbed a sea of information. I had thought sales, branding, and marketing were interchangeable. But upon reading my first marketing book, I gained a total awareness of the differences among the three. Along with its dating symmetry. I was in the game now.
In Reference to the ladies
Before we dive into this, know that being good with girls comes down to 2 things:
- Knowing what they want, and understanding that giving them what they want is your duty. It’s not about you. It’s about them.
- Women have 2-X-chromosomes: a double dose of intuition. And have used it to populate the earth with genetic-mini-me’s of the strongest males. Their survival, no the SURVIVAL OF THE HUMAN RACE, depends on them being able to accurately filter the weak from the strong. AKA: their bullshit detectors are maxed out.
Giving girls what they need requires communicating your solution through feelings and not rationality. And the more congruent your messaging is (Branding, Marketing, Sales), the more effective you will be at converting customers into buyers.
Like 6x + 7y = 6bloods + 7crips.
1.Branding: Your Promise to Your Customers
- What do you stand for and what do you represent?
- Identify your target market – does my branding match what they need?
- Can create loyal customers
Branding is your promise about your service to your customers and buyers: that you are what they need. And since we are here to win – I am going to assume you are innovating your market: You are going to fulfill the buyer’s needs in such fashion that they will be life long customers.
Branding to the Ladies:
With women you are communicating to the XX-cromosomes. An intuition that tells them breed, or eliminate his genetics from the gene-pool forever. You are communicating to her inner cave woman. And cave people don’t speak English. You must engage their feelings.
Now like I said before—BS detectors. The brand you represent will only get your foot in the door. The more indicators you trip for mate selection, the better your chances are of getting your foot in the door. Things that trip mate selection sensors—Tall-dark-handsome, dominant body language, physically imposing, respectable in a meritocracy, mastery of a skill, accomplishments, money (security), confidence, preselection (other girls like him).
Anecdotally some girls will value things differently, and there are different ways to display the same thing. The more congruency that you can display to the market, the better chance you have of them opening themselves to your approach.
For your brand, this may be your education/degrees, prior work experience, awards won on the job, aka your resume.
2.Marketing: Raising the Buying Temperature of Customers
Marketing activates buyers and is largely emotional. Humans are motivated by eliminating discomfort and improving their situations. However, eliminating discomfort tends to be a much more powerful motivator – I spoke on how comfort is used to suppress human nature here.
Effective marketing comes down to being able to make people feel discomfort. Personally, I am a bit of an asshole and maybe arrogant. But I am also the most humble, nice guy I know. Typically, as an innovator, before you sell out to the man, you will be operating from a place of love trying to help out others. So i mean this with all seriousness:
If you are nice you are going to have to be a dick to be an effective marketer.
This is called “activating buyers”. As a nice guy you will have to really overcorrect to activate buyers. This is because as hard as you try to be mean, you will always pull your punches. You have to make buyers insecure and feel bad about their failures and shortcomings. It’s just a mental landmine you will have to get over. And the more uncomfortable you feel, the better job you are doing. If you over correct strong enough, the feeling of dick-ness should subside within about 20-pitches. As this happens you will come to see your assholery to be nothing more than just making them aware of pain points, and that the solution is here.
Marketing to the Ladies:
A great way of driving insecurity is through creating scarcity – having a limited quantity of what the customer wants. It today’s sexual marketplace, the supply of suitable mates is scarce. And it will only continue to shrink as women continue to out-earn men. Confidence is a strong indicator of a suitable mate that you can use to show congruency with your brand and drive up buying temperature.
Bright colors, “sexy shirts,” blazers/sports coats, engaging t-shirts, unique wrist accessories, allowed me to ‘peacock,’ drawing attention very easily. Now that I had their attention they could screen my brand: masculine body language, non-verbal communication, eye contact, 6’9”, chocolate – driving scarcity up with each checkbox.
While girls will not approach, they will make themselves “Available to being approached.” How I marketed myself activated high temperature buyers through the dread of missing out on what they want. If you are approaching and getting blown out, or not getting the call backs for business, it’s because you are shit at getting people to give your brand a chance to wow them. Find a way to get more eyeballs on you.
You owe it to those who want your help to do what is necessary and let them know you have what they want.
Real life of Dax Hill:
My dashiki game was strong in mind 2010s, and with no one in Austin rocking them, it was always something that made it very easy to approach women.
Then Black Panther dropped.
I remember I went to a bar a few days later, and everyone in that thing had on one. Instantly, I demoted to the flock of normies, and it showed as there was massively more resistance to buyers.
3.Sales: Converting a High Buying Temperature Customer into a Buyer
Sales comes down to using both logic and emotion to move a buyer with a high buying temperature towards a purchase, aka “don’t-F-it-up-game.” Naturally, they will have reservations, objections, and need some persuading. They are about to give you their hard fought resources for your service.
There are tactics to selling. But let’s talk about you: you have what they need, and you are doing them a favor by finding them, persuading them, and doing all the heavy lifting to make their lives better, etc.
It should piss you off a bit. And that is your frame: “I am here to help you. You need to take it.” More on frame in a second..
And with that we arrive at Respect. The #1 rule of sales is always be willing to take the L. And I don’t mean lesson, I mean “Loss.” You have to be willing to not land the deal.
Them: “That is a ‘dick thing to do,’ I have money, you want this money, who do you think you are to say no to me?!?! I AM THE CUSTOMER!!!”
Coincidentally, when it comes to girls, nice guys finish last.
Selling to the Ladies:
Sales takes frame control. In a romantic relationship the person who needs the other the least has the power. Same can be said for sales. And with that comes frame control. As a salesman, and when dealing with women: IT TAKES CONFIDENCE.
For a girl to trust your branding she will test the sturdiness of your brand’s frame. Will it collapse revealing you as a fraud? Or will it show strength that her XX-chromosomes can rely on you as a mate? If you fail these tests, usually by supplicating, you will be filtered into the bin with all the other low value, thirsty, desperate betas in her DMs.
Her: “To give away his will power, time, and attention to a complete stranger for free, he must have low value.”
Her: “Why are you so desperate? Is it because you are unlikeable?”
This is a Shit test.
It is natural to want to please people you like, especially those we are attracted to. It’s just a nice thing to do. But this is where we cross the line to become a dick.
To convert customers into buyers you must navigate the buyers’ shit tests with story telling and rationale that makes them FEEL that you are congruent with your branding.
And your ultimate tool: be willing to take the ‘L’.
This creates a feeling of scarcity. That you must have options to be able to say no to such a sexy lady. And if you have options, you must be mating material. The same way that being able to walk away from a deal shows the customer that you understand your value and brand. And that you will not budge on it, because their competitor across the street will take the deal.
Hopefully you are seeing the overlap and separation of concepts that created my confusion.
First we must talk about the phrase “using someone.” There is nothing wrong with that. Relationships of all types are typically people using each other for their resources, skills, and networks, to help each other succeed together. The issue is when you start abUSING someone. Leverage your network to create and connect to high temperature customers.
This will be social media, BLOG POSTS!!!!!, youtube, text messages, referrals, testimonials, introductions, etc. So when you hear “leave a comment,” or “likes and shares are free,” it’s not about random interaction.
Retweets, shares, and double taps have become a form of currency and validation. When I began to understand “using others” my perspective changed. I want the people I love and care for to be successful, so if my network can help them be successful, I am happy to help them. If all they are asking for is a comment, a like, a share, or a retweet, it’s the least I can do to support the people who are working hard to chase success.
Networking to the Ladies:
This is called DHV: demonstrating high value.
Things that show congruency: Having access to VIP areas, knowing “Secret spots” in your city, friendships with high value people, having people perform favors for you, having a good wing man talk you up. These instantly raise buying temperatures the same way having a trusted friend introducing you to a potential business partner lowers your skepticism.
Allowing a woman to “discover” your greatness on her own, allows her to feel your value. Just like a rando running their mouth about their accomplishments feels like a ‘try-hard‘ and untrustworthy.
Concluding the Series
- Irrational Overconfidence—do you have the confidence to take your ideals & skills, and build an uncertain future?
- Screening your ideas—do your ideas/skills have a fertile environment to create revenue?
- The Tri-force—having a service that delivers, can you transition customers into buyers?.
Those are the three things you need to consider before jumping into entrepreneurship. Within those three there is a ton of nuance. But, at a topical level, if you can satisfy those, you should definitely explore entrepreneurship.
Ultimately everything is about the journey. In pursuing entrepreneurship, either your idea will blossom, or it will fail. But should it fail, you will find the skills and lessons learned, raising your value as you pivot to a new venture, or return to being an employee with a massive upgrade in software.
Entrepreneurship is a battle of time and discomfort. Success is found in the process not the destination.
A Final Thought
You need to be selling to buyers with high buying temperatures. While I said respecting yourself and taking the L was important, there is a much more crucial aspect in both business and women over this topic:
Luke warm buyers will critique their purchase. High temperature buyers will rationalize the purchase as ‘worth it.’ Unless the product is total garbage – which is total incongruency and you deserve it.
This creates an opening for the market to label you as ‘trash,’ killing your business. With women, it’s a little grapey. Why would you want to be with someone who isn’t sure about if they want to be with you? Think about that.
Just my opinion.
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I hope you enjoyed this 3 part series. And I really hope you decide to look into entrepreneurship. You are worth more than you realize.
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