How To Ride A Bike

I thought about writing an article on how to ride a bike, but I figured that was too easy. So I had my 13-year-old write it instead.

What follows is the result of literally seconds of research done by a highly experienced expert who just recently celebrated his 13th birthday:

Hi , I’m a thirteen year old boy who knows how to ride a bike. Today I will be explaining the criteria for properly using and parking a bike.

Step 1: Mount the bike and put the kickstand up.

Step 2: You’re gonna want to put your feet on the pedals and start pumping your legs to make the bike go forward.

Step 3: Once you’re done riding, slowly stop pedaling and get ready to put the kickstand down by taking your feet off the bike and positioning them on the ground.

Some people like to sit there for a few seconds and fall sideways with no intention to get off the bike. This is an example of what not to do.

As someone who’s never used training wheels and has been riding a bike since I was three, I thought this would be self explanatory. But apparently not.

So if you go by the name Joe Biden please check with your doctor to make sure you are ready to start riding a bike before attempting this procedure.